Several years (and about a hundred and twenty pounds) ago I was a soda addict. I drank soda pretty much every day on a pretty consistent basis. I made a decision one day, and stopped drinking soda, probably about 10 years ago now.
Well, every once in a while, I get the urge, so I have a drink. Sometimes Coke, sometimes Ginger Ale, sometimes Root Beer. Just something I need to quench that craving. When that liquid first hits my lips, I am in love. So sweet, so refreshing, so satisfying… and then it hits my gut and goes totally sideways.
That pretty much covers my feelings about the G.I. Joe: Renegades figures.
I didn’t think so.
I have been exuberant in expressing my love for the G.I. Joe: Renegades property, pretty much since day one. I’m an eager consumer when it comes to the Joe brand, and when new media is out there (whether animated or live action) I get myself ready to jump right on board. And since we’re talking about G.I. Joe, when new media comes out, well… of course new toys are going to come out, right? Of course.
Well, not so much.
See, the fantastic G.I. Joe: Renegades series was summarily canceled many moons ago, and the series actually had its finale in early July. So of course it makes perfect sense for the first figures to hit retail in late September, when kids are back in school, and nobody even remembers that a G.I. Joe animated series was on television. Yeah, I’m a bit bitter.
Where does this whole terrible soda analogy come in? When I first saw the packaging, it was like that first sip of Barqs, or on those rare occasions, Dr. Pepper. So sweet, so refreshing… and then I remember the series is canceled, these figure releases are temporary, and we’re likely not even going to see Destro, The Baroness, or even Roadblock for crying out loud. And that’s when it goes sideways. That’s when it hits my gut.
But you know, I’m going to try like heck to review these figures on a more objective basis, taking them piece by piece instead of getting mired in the depression that is the G.I. Joe: Renegades brand. So, anyway, stay tuned. I’ve got two more 30th Anniversary reviews coming up, then hope to get Renegades hot on the heels. Should be a lively series of updates over the next week.